One of my clients called me before leaving for the Best Ever Conference this week.
He was fired up. Great energy. Bags packed.
Then e told me his goal:
"I want to close three LP investors."
I smiled, then told him he was thinking about it completely wrong.
Not because the goal was too ambitious. Not because the conference was the wrong place. But the second he walks into that room with "close" as his objective, he's already lost. And he doesn't know it yet.
Every conversation becomes a pitch.
Every handshake becomes a transaction.
And people can smell that like lutefisk (which is a delicious Norwegian fish but very very stinky).
When I said it, his shoulders dropped a bit. Then something shifted.
Here's the framework I walked him through.
🧠 Why "Closing" at Conferences Backfires
Here's what most syndicators “get” but avoid:
The goal of closing a deal requires a level of trust that doesn't exist with a stranger you met 20 minutes ago. Doesn't matter how polished your pitch is.
Research on social exchange theory - developed by sociologist Peter Blau - shows that trust builds through repeated, reciprocal interactions over time. Not through a single impressive display of influence.
Translation: You can't manufacture in one conference what takes months to build naturally.
For capital raisers, this creates a painful trap. You fly across the country, invest serious time and dough, and feel pressure to come home with something to show.
So you push. You pitch.
And investors feel the transaction energy……and subconsciously label you as “salesy” (your worst nightmare).
Here's how the "I need to close" mindset shows up:
1) You stop listening and start presenting.
Instead of learning what moves this person to invest, you're waiting for an opening to talk about your deal. And they feel it. The conversation goes flat.
2) You make people feel like a target.
The moment someone senses you're sizing them up for capital, their walls go up. What could have been a real relationship becomes a polished and polite rejection.
3) You go home frustrated.
No closes, a pile of business cards, and that nagging feeling that conferences "don't work." Or even worse, that YOU aren’t cut out for this.
The problem isn't the conference, and it’s not you. It's the wrong objective going in.
So here’s how my guy changed his perspective...
💥 What This Means for You
Whether you're heading to a conference soon or just working your investor network from home, the principle is the same:
Capital follows trust. Trust follows genuine connection.
Here's your next step:
Pick your next five investor interactions - calls, coffees, conferences, doesn't matter. Before each one, write down one question you're genuinely curious about and one thing you can offer them that isn’t your deal. No pitch. No agenda.
That's your move.
The best capital raisers I work with don't close people. They build relationships where saying yes feels easy and obvious. And you can too.
To you and your investors,
Chris
P.S. If you want to learn how to create deep, lasting investor relationships in minutes - not years - I'm hosting a live MoneyMental workshop on Tuesday, March 3rd at 11am CST.
This one’s on me (I practice what I preach).
RSVP with this link. Just a heads up that Zoom limits us to 10 RSVP participants.
Works Cited
Blau, P. M. (1964). Exchange and power in social life. Wiley.
Cropanzano, R., & Mitchell, M. S. (2005). Social exchange theory: An interdisciplinary review. Journal of Management, 31(6), 874–900.
Morgan, R. M., & Hunt, S. D. (1994). The commitment-trust theory of relationship marketing. Journal of Marketing, 58(3), 20–38.
Whipple, J. M., Lynch, D. F., & Nyaga, G. N. (2010). A buyer's perspective on collaborative versus transactional relationships. Industrial Marketing Management, 39(3), 507–518.